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You like me! Of course, you probably don't know me very well.


November 19th, 2015 by biscuit

Oh my god you guys. Nablopomo failure, obviously.

But also.

Me an Crockett are getting mmmmaaarrrrried.

And this one spot on my back … like, my lower back … like, my upper butt … ok, my butt itches. Not my BUTT butt but like a part of me where if some stranger was looking I’d be like STOP LOOKING AT MY BUTT butt. Like just under a tramp stamp, that area.

And Maida, my little tiny sweetie pie, has an eye ulcer that’s getting fixed and had two teeth that needed to be removed, including one of those long doggy ones at the back that’s like three regular people teeth.

And also (Dad stop reading) I had a very brief UTI earlier this week but I did what me and Crockett are now calling waterbed belly and fixed it.

And when you’re engaged (to get married to Crockett cause you’re super lucky oh wait that’s me) people are really happy for you and it’s an amazing feeling.

And when your dad has kind of a bummer month (hi again Dad you can start reading if you haven’t already) and you worry about him.

And … you know. When you’re a baby who can’t keep shit together to do a tiny wordpress thing every day.

Whatever. My papa is fine, Maida is fine, my bladder is fine, itching is not the end of the world, and me and Crockett are 2gether 4ever. Nablopomo fail, November win.

greenie weenie chefaleenie

November 4th, 2015 by biscuit

We’ve only ordered from Green Chef twice, and it’s most the expensive, and I haven’t liked all of the meals, but it’s kind of my favorite. That is possibly because I think things that cost more money are better? OTHERWISE WHY WOULD THEY COST MORE? HUH?

Everything comes in a tiny little labeled bag or brown paper box of it’s own. Some things are chopped up for you. It’s adorable.

Our favorite meal from Green Chef so far: Yellowfin Tuna Melt with lemon coleslaw, caper remoulade, and pickled shallots.

Our least favorite meal from Green Chef so far: Spice-Crusted Steak with spinach & green bean “tabbouleh,” and harissa chèvre.

the apron ’tis blue

November 3rd, 2015 by biscuit

Blue Apron is fine. Whatever. There are lots of choices but you can’t make them all – like I said yesterday, they have some weird algorithm. They throw the vegetables and proteins into the delivery box all willy nilly, but they put all the little meal accessories like tiny bottles of vinegar and sesame seeds into a paper bag labeled ‘knick knacks’. It’s cute.

Best meal we’ve had from them: Brie & Pear Grilled Cheese Sandwiches with Brussels Sprout, Arugula & Hazelnut Salad.

Worst meal we’ve had from them: Spiced Turkey & Chickpea Chili with Chermoula, Labneh & Pita Croutons.

That’s it, y’all. Blue Apron is fine.

box o’ food

November 2nd, 2015 by biscuit

Crockett and I have been doing those food delivery thingies.

Like, where you pick some recipes and then get a box full of the ingredients necessary to make them.

Those food delivery thingies.

I just finished the third dinner of our sixth week, and I am ready to offer opinions, but this is fucking nablopomo, my darlings. There will be no premature trigger pulling.

Here’s how it works. We’ve subscribed to Green Chef, Blue Apron, and Hello Fresh, and every week I add all of the available recipes from each service to our shared google doc and we decide which one to order from. That gives us ~15 meals to choose from (but only in one of 19 3-meal combinations, because various maths). Should you choose to emulate us in this, be forewarned – you gotta turn this shit off. The default is ON, and you might end up with more meals than you want. We haven’t ended up with double deliveries yet, and we’ve coincidentally ordered from each place twice.

Each of these services delivers enough food for three dinners, two servings each, every Thursday. (In our area, obviously. Your weekday may vary, but all deliveries are on weekdays.)

Each of these dinners is between 500 and 800 calories, which means many of the meals will feed Crockett once and me twice if we portion them correctly.

Not gunna lie, they’re expensive.

  • Green Chef is the priciest, at $80.94/week. The upside to Green Chef is that everything that can be organic is organic. The default plan (at the above price) gets you one seafood based meal, one meat based meal, and one vegetarian meal. You can go all veggie for cheaper or all meat for more. There are no meal selections here – you either take the meals in your plan or you don’t.
  • Hello Chef is $69/wk. Upside: locally sourced, I think. There are always five meals, and you choose three.
  • Blue Apron is $59/wk and the most famous. We’re actually getting our delivery from them this week too, which means they’re pulling ahead. It’s not because they’re better, necessarily, but they offer six meals from which you choose three. However, you can’t choose ANY three meals. There’s definitely some cost saving algorithm at work – if you choose the steak dish, you can no longer have the pork dish. It’s not quite that simple though, I haven’t figured it out.

Tonight I made something I from Blue Apron that I picked without Crockett’s input: Spicy Korean Chicken Wings with Rice Cakes & Baby Bok Choy. The rice cakes were little boiled pasta-y thingies and I super wanted to try them, and they were good. 

I was going to use that example for pricing, but here’s the thing: it had a soy glaze, the weird rice cakes, and Gochujang, a Korean chile paste. Those things were probably not expensive, but I got the correct amount of each one of them they aren’t things I necessarily would have found in a grocery store on my own. (Ok, the chile paste and soy glaze are def at Whole Foods. Still, I would have had to buy a bunch of each. And the rice cakes are a total fucking mystery to me.) I’m guessing it was 8 or 9 dollars worth of actual food, based on my many, many years of grocery shopping. That means tonight I paid a 100% markup, give or take, for having things delivered. That’s rough, but also I like to cook and this is one of the less valuable examples. Two weeks ago we had 10 oz of pretty amazing steak (from … not Blue Apron) and it was probably worth $12 on it’s own. Still, it would very, definitely, completely, without a doubt be cheaper to pick recipes and go shopping.

But it would also be hard for two people to have a weekly menu that didn’t use anything twice. And it would require a lot of shopping.

Anyway, tomorrow: Blue Apron! Meals, thoughts, pictures…. so much to look forward to. A happy nablopomo to us all!


November 1st, 2015 by biscuit

Three weeks ago, I made this pumpkin spice latte recipe. I made a whole can o’ pumpkin worth of mix, then put it in the fridge and heated some up with cashew milk and then added it to my coffee every damn morning.

It is fucking. Delicious.

(I used less sugar and made my own pumpkin spice mix but with like 1/3 as much cinnamon because cinnamon is the stupidest spice (with the exception of black pepper, which I like fine, except for how it’s in every recipe like salt – pepper is not like salt, people, pepper is a spice) and who am I to overwhelm my delicious lattes with the second stupidest spice. I am aware that the linked recipe includes black pepper and I basically just pretended that line was a funny inside joke between me and the author.)

Then two weeks ago I did the same thing, except that time I added some cayenne. It was brilliant. (Just a teeny pinchy pinch, guys, this is a morning drink.)

Then ONE week ago I was like whooop well time to make that fun mix I’m going to drink every day until I die and I went to my cabinet for pumpkin and there was none.

Zero pumpkin.

AND I’d just heard about the pumpkin shortage. The linked article has sound because CNN is the cinnamon of the news world, but the important line is, “That means when stores sell out, they’ll likely be out until next year’s harvest.”

Needless to say I went on a pumpkin hunt. I came back with nine 15 oz cans, two 28 oz cans, and two 15 oz boxes (thanks for being nonconformist Whole Foods!).

I have enough for lattes through my birthday, assuming I don’t get tired of them or decide to sacrifice a can or two to a dessert at some point.

The point of that story that sometimes, I think to myself … well, I if I’m in, I might as well be all in, right?

The relevance moving forward of that point is that: I’m going to try to do National Novel Writing Month and National Blog Posting Month. It will be like some terrible, look-at-a-computer-all-day and then look-at-a-computer-all-night kind of bootcamp. Right? Right.