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emmanation

You like me! Of course, you probably don't know me very well.

Archive for October, 2010

hush – the grownups are trying to work

Friday, October 29th, 2010

Yesterday, I met with my Algorithm Design project team.

One fellow is a grad student, like moi, except he’s a TA instead of an RA.

I feel morally and intellectually superior being an RA – that’s a real thing, right? Like how short people are always able to feel morally and intellectually superior to tall people? Some people are just better than other people. It’s the way of the world. Other examples include people who match their shoes to their belts and people who love the hell out of their hair. (Sadly, I’m not in that last category, but fingers crossed, one day I shall be.)

The other is this goofy senior.

They’re both hilarious, which is good.

They’re also kind of lame.

Two weeks ago, I specifically said ‘hey, since the project is due the Monday after Halloween, let’s see how much we can get done early so we can play on Halloween weekend’. Then, I tried to get them together. For a week and a half. Our meeting yesterday was the FIRST meeting.

Their stated reason for not minding working over this upcoming weekend?

NEITHER OF THEM HAS ANY PLANS.

I thought college students were supposed to be cool, man.

*disappointed head shake*

10 minutes of living dangerously

Thursday, October 28th, 2010

I bought my car, brand spanking new, in 2005. It looks like this.

With a few more dings.

Ok, fine, a lot more dings. What? I’ve had it for five years and three months. That’s a long time to not run into ANYTHING. Right?

I bought a new car, way back then, because I can’t really be trusted to take good care of things without a lot of reminders. When you get a new one, I figured, the dealership helps you remember to do things like change your oil, and if they were helping, I’d totally get it done.

In retrospect, that’s not true. I mean, the reminders are sort of true, but the me actually taking care of my car just because of the occasional email?

Not true.

I think the only way I will ever have a vehicle that gets all of its maintenance in a timely manner is if someone drives to my house and forcibly takes it from me to perform said maintenance. Is there a service that does that?

Anyway, today I went to Jiffy Lube. My ‘maintenance needed’ light came on some time in July, so I figured it was about time.  I only have 35,000 miles on the car, so don’t get all huffy – it’s not like I’m putting on a thousand miles a week here, y’all. 35k in five years. (Dear everyone who isn’t my father: the huffy comment was not directed at you – I know you won’t get huffy!)

I drove in, made my selections, turned down a new air filter for the cabin (it’s THE OUTSIDE – why am I filtering outdoor air out of my car? This makes no sense to me. Outdoor air is awesome.), and sat down to wait.

Ten minutes later, a tech came in laughing and asked me how I got the huge yellow streak and dent on the top edge of the roof. Apparently they each tried to come up with a way it could have happened, and I was to settle it for them.

I explained. He chortled and returned to work.

I think that before I told him that it was a parking garage incident, they thought I was some sort of rule breaking badass – that perhaps I’d driven through a pedestrian underpass in pursuit of a shoplifter, or gone off a jump in a skate park in my car and hit a lightpost.

I wish I’d told one of those stories instead. For 10 minutes there, I WAS a badass.

Not a girl who misjudges her turn radius in parking garages.

Oh well.

worst. hockey fan. evah.

Wednesday, October 27th, 2010

Last night, via IM.

me: GO SABRES!

Crockett: They lost.

me: Oh. Um… I must’ve sent that while they were in the lead, towards the end there.

Crockett: The closest they ever were to being in the lead was 3 to 5.

me: Maybe when Paul Gaustad, my hockey boyfriend, made that one goal?

Crockett: He took five shots and not a single one went in.

me: Huh.

Crockett: Yeah.

holidays

Tuesday, October 26th, 2010

It’s getting to be that time.

Halloween is in less than a week, then Thanksgiving is three and a half weeks later. My christmas tree comes one day after that.

I positively adore this time of year, but I don’t think it’s because I have a special connection to any of these holidays, exactly.

It’s because I enjoy a celebration.

Really, I will celebrate anything. Ask Crockett. Last night while making dinner, I suggested that we call our sandwiches ‘yay I quit my internship today’ sandwiches.

I’m not sure what this is, on my part. Is it an inability to embrace the even pleasantness of every day life? Or rather, is it an enthusiasm for even the silliest things?

I prefer to think it’s the latter, but it may be the former. One of the issues that I had with being a working stiff was the complete and total lack of things to look forward to. Two weeks a year of vacation and a raise once every twelve months? Are you kidding me? If you set your enthusiasm clock with those, it would wind down by January 15th. I started celebrating silly things just to have something.

Now that I’m in school again, I have milestones galore. Every week I will have finished a major project, for example, or taken a scary test. I have fewer than two months until Christmas break, and then the whole cycle starts again. I haven’t gotten out of the habit of little celebrations, though. I get a pumpkin latte after an exam, or to rent a movie after finishing a crappy project. I carve a pumpkin to celebrate a slightly increased understanding of dynamic programming.

My question is, if you celebrate little things, does that detract from the big things? I do feel that in order to make them stand out, I need to make holidays and birthdays into gigantic deals, but I’m not sure that’s a bad thing.

What do you celebrate?

Welcome to the dollhouse

delusional smelusional

Monday, October 25th, 2010

Have you ever wondered if you’re crazy and you just don’t know?

I’ve heard that if you’re crazy, it never occurs to you to wonder if you’re crazy, but I’m going to have to call bullshit on that. In my SUPER extensive (and totally literarily based) experience, crazy people have moments all the time where they realize they might be crazy.

It’s not that I think I’m crazy.

I don’t DO anything crazy. I mostly just hang out with my dogs and my man and do my homework and go for runs and go to class. None of those things say ‘crazy’ to me.

It’s just that, sometimes, I wonder. What if what I think is normal isn’t? Or worse, what if what I think I’m doing isn’t what I’m doing? What if, like Buffy in that one episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer which is the best show ever so shut your whore mouth while you’re talking about it, I’m in some institution somewhere, all doped up and insisting that I really am in Algorithm Design class to my doctors?

I wonder if the meds are good, in that probably-not institution. I wonder if it’s relaxing there.

Anyway. Pretty sure I’m not crazy. You?