emmanation

I have a pretty rockin’ life. For example, no one has yet called me on my recent verging-on-abusive use of the word ‘rockin’.

Of course, that’s not all. I have people who love me that I love back, a good job, fabulous friends, yada yada pretend-I’m-talking-like-Charlie-Brown’s-mom-yada.

So my fabulous life is clearly not the point here, is it? I mean, if I wrote a whole post about how ‘golly gee I’m just so lucky and everything in my life is so perfect and look at how handsome my boyfriend is’, you’d probably want to stab me in the face (if you’re having a bad day). And of course, it’s not perfect, but I’m extremely grateful for where it’s good.

Also? Some things suck. Like:

• The light in my upstairs hallway is broken. At night. It works just fine during the day.
• Sometimes? When I’m walking the girls? Even though I inspect their poop pickin up bags for holes, I don’t see the hole that I later come to find in the grossest way possible. (Ok, the grossest way possible would be if I’d broken my hands and somehow had to use my mouth to pick up poop. A) That would never happen. B) I am so unbelievably sorry I just said that.)
• We have razors with six blades but no home laser razors. I really want a laser razor and it pisses me off that there is no such thing.
• The fact that the best celebrity I could come up with for Facebook this week of celebrity dopplegangers was Janeane Garofalo. Because what am I going to say – Natalie Portman? Even she’s who I really think I look like, it felt a little ‘hey Facebook I think I’m, like, the prettiest girl in the world’. Also, no one has said ‘Emma, WHY did you pick Janeane Garofalo? You look nothing like her at all! That’s just silly!’. No one. At all.
• I think that I’ve finally gotten all of my birthday presents. I was hoping for at least one more and at least a couple more cards and maybe an obligatory $5 from my grandma, but we’ve left my birthday month and I’m having to let that dream go. Go dream, go the way of my dream of one day waking up to find that I’ve not only finally gotten the American Girl doll I’ve always wanted, but that I’ve shrunk down to her size so we can go have adventures and never ever go to school ever again.

I think that’s all that sucks today. Other than the fact that dogs can detect earthquakes but we still can’t. Oh, and the fact that all of the A. Einsteins in the phone book use just the A, whereas all the A. Hitlers in the phone book spell their first name out. You know, in case someone wakes up and thinks ‘I’m going to call Einstein today and tell him ‘thumbs up dude’ and then find that Hitler guy and give him a piece of my mind’.

P.S. NEW MOVIE CLUB ANNOUNCEMENT. Hopefully this time we chose a movie by someone who is too busy to spend days trying to make me cry. Find out what the tiniest sprinter picked!