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emmanation

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Posts Tagged ‘#imwithherstill’

parting gifts

Monday, July 31st, 2017

Something that I loved very dearly popped back into my life last week, and then went away again, and it’s all VERY TRAUMATIC.

The Toast was the best website ever.

Don’t  take my word for it. This isn’t one of those goofy things that I love that has a niche following (like jokes about elephants in refrigerators and Zillow alerts for two-to-three bedroom houses with at least two bathrooms in very specific areas of LA). The Toast was an amazing project mostly undertaken by two women, who funded it with personal money because the internet is hard and sucks, and finally they had to quit. If you didn’t hover those links above, one of them is a goodbye post written by Hilary Clinton. Hil.Ar.Y. Clin.Ton.

(Ok, fine, it’s a niche. A really nice, cozy, smart, funny niche. I can think of worse things.)

The Toast closed last year because despite donations and I think some ads? they couldn’t afford to keep it going. I was genuinely very, very sad. Such a small writing staff made me feel like I knew these women, and I missed them when they were gone.

Then tiny hands trashfire did his thing and I had other things to worry about, but.

BUT.

Last Wednesday, The Toast threw eight new posts into the world. Just a hi howareya, nothing permanent. It was lovely but also gave me those sad feelings you have when you forgot how well something fit into your life. When you can’t have it, you get used to being without it and sometimes you even think gosh maybe it wasn’t even that good?, but then BOOM. It was that good.

I am the woman who went into a tailspin when my favorite band broke up. I am the woman that was so distraught on Twitter when one of my favorite authors died that TWO other famous authors privately messaged me to share my grief.

There’s a message here. Is it that I should be a less emotional person?

Or is it that The Toast should come back?

(I know what I vote.)

NB – I was going to write a ‘if X was your Y‘ post in remembrance/honor/cause I wanted to, but I couldn’t think of who to write it about. Riz Amhed? But that’s just because of the Charlie XCX Boys video. Crockett? Myself? (If Emma was your girlfriend … hm. Actually, that could be fun.) Angel from Buffy? Idris Elba and Mary-Louise Parker are taken already. I’ll think on it.

Something is better than nothing, but also sometimes something is ow.